Ryan blushed. But he managed to hide it behind terrible cough.
" So. You're then much tougher than our big boss. Wow." Ryan told when gained his voice back.

I looked at him and sat back down on the bench, right near him. "I don't try to be like that. I am like that. You have to be tough to get through life."

Ryan let a small smile flash on his face " Yeah I know. But it's good thing. I've learned to be strong in a hard way but still feel like when I woke up after crash. " he sighed and rubbed his eyebrow " Guess I have to tell H truth"

I looked at him and then down. "And what would happen? If he knew?" I asked.

Ryan sighed. He'd thought about that while ago. " Well either fire me or put to desk duty. But before that I'd go through pity and stuff like people usually tells you when finds out you're just a bunch of crap pretending to be fine." it mostly covered his thoughts on the matter " I'd be out of force faster than I was last time. But I'm sure even faster" the last time. He'd thought about that too. One secret must stay with him forever. If someone finds out he's out without a second chance. Or third as it was now.

It would've been too bad to lose a great detective like him just like that, and I knew it. "Why do you want to tell him? You've been hiding that from him for such a long time, why do you want to ruin everything you've done?"

Ryan smiled and rubbed his eyebrow "Yeah I know it's insane but I'm getting worse. And my doc wants me to try some experimental therapy. Besides I might need a brain surgery soon. These things kinda hard to hide. I'm already wondering how the hell I manage to hide it from H." he kinda felt stunned by the fact he was still around

I looked up at him again. "I think you want to take a big step to quickly. Just wait, please. Wait to see how it goes. You can't just leave."

Ryan nodded. He didn't want either. But sooner or later it will come out...
" You think? Ok. I will wait. I don't want to leave either. Besides there still might be angels in the heaven and H would react completely different. " Ryan suddenly felt thousands of butterflies in his stomach

I smiled when I heard he still wanted to wait. "Yes, I think. You can't leave everyone like that. Your sister, your coworkers... You can't leave me. I know many people here, but I don't make friends easily. And yet, you are my friend. You can't leave."

A flush of warmth rose in his chest making him smile his megawatt smile " I doubt I would be able to leave any of you. And I hope I'll never need to do that. Besides you're one of rare people that made friends with me. I was pretty neglected here when started. "
Ryan felt like finally realising he wasn't all alone. He'd so used to being alone that now it was hard to believe he had friends. "Well my sis would gather our half-siblings and make us all live in my house, if I ever decide to leave lab."

I sincerely smiled when I heard his words. I had never been crazy about having real friends or something like that, but now it was different. "Thank you," I said quietly and let my head rest on his shoulder again, in a friendly way.

Ryan suddenly felt much better. He had best support he ever hoped for.
" No thank you. You made me realise few things and now I know I will stay no matter what" he wrapped an arm around Ava

I smiled with all my heart, even though he couldn't see me. I was happy to know I wasn't going to lose him. The sadness I was feeling was actually starting to go away. I let his arm around me and took his other hand in mine.

Ryan's heart was full of warmth and happiness. He felt like some part of his heart had been placed back. Like an emptiness being replaced by fullness.
So they sat there beaming at each other's thoughts...

After a few moments of silence, I looked up at him and chuckled a bit. "You do realize that if anyone sees us like that, they will think we're a couple, right?"

Ryan blushed " Ah whatever. Do we really care? I'd let them think whatever their twisted minds can bring up." a sheepish grin spread over his face and reached the deep hazel orbs

I let out a small laugh, as I put my arm around his waist. "No, we don't," I said, still smiling at the view of him blushing.

Ryan smiled in reply. He could still feel his face being red.
He very careful and slow breathed in the fresh park air.
"It feels so good here. I'm glad I found you as my friend." he simply said

I had never felt better than then. "I'm glad I found you too," I told him quietly. After a few more moments of silence, I chuckled again. "You know what would really be a problem? Your girlfriend passing by and seeing us like that," I said. I didn't even know if he had a girlfriend, but I assumed he did.

Ryan laughed at the thought. His girlfriend. Well Sam did some crazy stuff and usually it ended up with four inch stiletto in his back or big black bruise on his face in the morning.
"Oh don't worry. She won't do that. Not anymore. But some years ago I'd be lying in dumpster next morning."

I laughed softly. "Ouch," I said, wrinkling my nose.

"Oh yeah. It was really ouchy. Especially when she put me out of house for a night just because I was little drunk. So I had to spend the night with dog." he told laughing at the memory

I chuckled and looked up at him. "Are you serious?" I asked with a grin.

"Unfortunately serious. I still have this scar from that night. We tried to share his booth" he said showing the large line across his palm